Won Me

As the story goes, a Cherokee elder was sitting with his grandchildren. He told them, “In every life there is a terrible fighta fight between two wolves. One is evil: he is fear, anger, envy, greed, arrogance, self-pity, resentment, and deceit. The other is good: joy, serenity, humility, confidence, generosity, truth, gentleness, and compassion.”

One of his grandchildren asked, “Grandfather, which wolf will win?” The elder looked him in the eye and replied, “The one you feed.”

This brief story contains a far-reaching truth. You choose which traits, attitudes, beliefs, and values you will give attention to. And what you focus on will grow and expand. For example, if you value honesty, this value will affect all of your dealings and interactions with others. If you nurture and “feed” resentment, it will eventually take over your life.

Continually focusing on marriage problems makes the relationship seem even worse than it actually is. If you continually talk about how you’ve been done wrong and how angry you are at your spouse, your anger will grow and blot out your memories of more positive times. When that happens, you are unable to see a balanced picture.

The more energy you devote to focusing on the negatives in your relationship, the worse and more hopeless everything seems. And when you’re feeding your negativity, your creative energy is frozen. Thus, you don’t have the ability to generate helpful options or a fresh perspective.

You influence your perception of reality by the thoughts you think, the beliefs you hold, and the attitudes you cultivate. According to Katherine Mansfield, “Could we change our attitude, we should not only see life differently, but life itself would come to be different. Life would undergo a change of appearance because we ourselves had undergone a change of attitude.”

In each moment, you decide whether to make negative or positive interpretations about the events and people in your life. These interpretations shape your experience of reality and impact your capacity to be all you can possibly be. They also affect your expectations about what is possible.

Choosing to develop qualities such as compassion, honesty, serenity, and joy can transform your marriage and your life. And choosing to reduce the resentment, anger, deceit, and fear in your life can lighten your emotional load and leave you will more energy to generate creative solutions to your marriage problems.

As you become more positive, you bring more positive energy into your interactions with your spouse. When this happens, surprising things can happen in your marriage. The sharp, prickly edge of anger can start to soften between you and your partner. New insights and understandings about a situation can occur, and you can be more likely to find the middle ground of compromise.

The following tips can assist you in training yourself to focus more on what’s right with your marriage and your life:

1.Take the time each day to list the things that you are grateful for in your life. Remember to include the things people often take for granted, such as three meals a day, a hot shower, heat, a stove and refrigerator, running water, medical care, and friends.

2.Each day, remind yourself of your spouse’s positive qualities and contributions to your life. Think back to what attracted you to your partner initially. Reflect on how your spouse has caused you to stretch and grow and on how much you’ve learned from the experience.

3.Write in your journal about what positive qualities in yourself you want to cultivate and develop. These are the attitudes, beliefs, and values that you want to focus on and encourage to take root, grow, and thrive in your life.

4.Visit a library or bookstore and select some inspirational reading material and inspirational tapes or CD’s. Find the time each day to read or listen to something that is positive, encouraging, and inspiring. It’s important to refill at the well of inspiration daily.

5.Spend less time with friends and family members who are negative and leave you feeling depressed and fatigued. There’s a name for those individuals who drain your positive energy”energy vampires.” Instead, cultivate new friends who are positive, supportive, and encouraging and who bring out the best in you.

Nancy J. Wasson, Ph.D., is co-author of Keep Your Marriage: What to Do When Your Spouse Says “I don’t love you anymore!” This is available as an e-book at http://www.KeepYourMarriage.com ,where you can also sign up for the free Keep Your Marriage Internet Magazine to get weekly ideas and support to help you improve your marriage. Nancy can be contacted at Nancy@KeepYourMarriage.com.

Movies are rife with new places and circumstances for having sex. We watch our favorite actors copulating in elevators, on airplanes, in semi-public, in space, in the jungle, in a limo, on the floor, the kitchen table - anywhere that it is possible. At times thrilling, it also often looks uncomfortable or impractical. In fact, most of the sex we enjoy through life, after the cars and hidden places of our youth, is in bed.

Does using the same scenery mean that the play must be boring and derivative? Not necessarily. Without intending to hurt the feelings or egos of set designers, the focus of any production is on the characters and the action. Next to that, everything else pales.

So how do we inject some creativity and novelty into our sex lives to avoid endless repetition and an eventual decline in the level of our excitement?

We can manipulate our circumstances to break the routine of a few nights a week of sex before sleep. Change the timing of our intimacy and the routine dissolves. After the advent of a baby, for example, many husbands complain that their wives no longer concentrate on the action, one ear always cocked for a tell-tale cry. Time your moments together for when the baby sleeps longest, perhaps the early evening or Sunday morning. Take the baby to the babysitter’s house or to the grandparents and use the free time to rekindle the sparks that have inevitably been dampened by the demanding stranger who has invaded your lives.

If you have a fireplace, put on a log and start foreplay on a soft rug in front of the flames. You can move to the bedroom later, for the comfort, but the desire will be freshened by the fireside initiation. If you have older children or relatives living with you, often the only refuge available is your bedroom at night. See if you can send the kids to the movies and your mother-in-law to the local Church bingo and seize the opportunity to again act like a carefree young couple with only each other on your minds.

Most importantly, practice concentration on the “now.” We all have so many things on our minds that our thoughts flit endlessly to the problems at work, the financial stresses we are under, and the need to get chores done and things fixed. Men, for multiple physiological reasons, seem better able to concentrate on sex for the relatively brief time it takes for them to move from arousal to action to completion. Women usually take longer to arouse and longer to reach a climactic conclusion. It therefore requires more effort, for a longer period of time, for women to disengage from mental processing to bodily sensations and feelings.

A sensitive mate acknowledges this and helps the process by allowing for longer lead time, starting the intimacy and arousal foreplay long before the act ever starts. Failure to do so too often results in denial (”I’m not in the mood; I have a headache”) or limited engagement (”We need to paint this ceiling; I have to get up so early tomorrow”).

If both parties can communicate what works for them, and help to mold the behavior of the other in order to enhance the experience of both, then the routine becomes an eagerly anticipated event that allows for mutual sharing, enjoyment, and fulfillment.

Wedding dresses are literally the icing on the cake on every bride’s wedding day. You can find perfect wedding gowns online, or simply brainstorm which style of wedding dresses to start looking for as you narrow down your search.

First you need to determine which types of wedding dresses are right for you.

Your wedding dress should tell the world exactly who you are. After all, this is YOUR day, and your wedding gown is the key way that you share yourself with your wedding guests and, of course, your husband-to-be.

By now, you’ve likely given some thought as to what kind of wedding you would like to have: traditional, informal or a theme wedding, perhaps.

Here are some general guidelines:

In formal weddings, brides generally wear long white/cream-colored wedding dresses and a veil, perhaps a train and, of course, gloves.

In semi-formal weddings, brides generally wear long white/cream-colored wedding dresses, a veil and gloves if desired.

In informal weddings, brides have more flexibility. They can wear wedding gowns of any color short or long or even a suit.

What about theme weddings? Here you should decide first on the theme and then on the formality of the wedding you’ve always wanted to have. Only then is it time to shop for wedding dresses and wedding accessories to determine which ones match your theme!

As you can see, the most important aspect to consider when selecting wedding dresses is your own sense of style.

For specifics on what’s appropriate to wear for each type of wedding, I recommend Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette, which devotes an entire chapter to wedding dresses and other fashion dos and don’ts, or Vera Wang on Weddings, in which Wang shares her vast fashion expertise with you as you plan your wedding. Both can be purchased from any major online bookstore and have great tips on buying wedding dresses.

How can you purchase wedding dresses online?

The Internet can be a tremendous help when you’re looking for wedding gowns and have a tight wedding budget. And let’s face it most of us do have to keep the bottom line in mind when we plan the most important day of our romantic lives.

After you have given some thought to the type of wedding you want to have, I recommend that you:

• Look through bridal magazines and check out your options by flipping through the pages to see which wedding dresses are available in your area.
• Go to local bridal stores and try on wedding gowns.
• Look online to see what other wedding dresses are available to you. In case you’re uncertain about buying wedding gowns from an online vendor, bear in mind that there really are online bridal shops that deliver the same level of service as regular stores.
• Compare the in-store price to the Internet dress stores to find out which is the better deal. Many online stores offer you discount wedding dresses because of their vastly reduced overhead costs!
• Narrow down your search to a handful of wedding dresses that make your final cut.

When you’ve gone through all these steps, you’re certain to have accessed all the wedding dresses available to you — and you will very likely save your hard-earned money if you end up finding discount wedding dresses available only from an Internet vendor.

Good luck with your search! Though it might seem daunting at first, if you follow these tips, you’ll be well on your way to finding a beautiful range of perfectly elegant wedding dresses.

Stacey Martin is the publisher of MarriedBliss.com, where you will find objective reviews of online wedding vendors, tips on wedding planning, advice on where to buy wedding dresses online and much more helpful content for brides-to-be and couples planning their weddings.

http://MarriedBliss.com — Plan your wedding with the help of the Web!

The more realistic you are as you prepare for marriage, the more likely you are to have a successful one. Therefore, it is incumbent upon you to give serious consideration to your expectations of your fiancé. Are they realistic? Are they fair?

Far too many couples enter marriage with unrealistic expectations of the marriage and of each other. In more marriages than we would choose to believe, couples inability to meet the other’s expectations resulted in the marriage’s premature demise.

Here are 4 don’ts that if adhered to will avert a lot of discord and emotional turmoil in the marriage and help to make your marriage a satisfying one.

1) Don’t expect your partner to be able to read your mind. It is unfair, unrealistic and nescient. Some people get an attitude and break marital harmony because they did not get the “gift” they expected or wanted, yet they did not communicate this to their spouse. Our minds are too complex and changing for anyone to know what we are thinking. TELL your partner what you want or be open to accepting whatever is given you in the spirit in which it is given. Of course, this is not only in regards to the material but to behaviors as well. Let your partner know what your expectations are. Communicate. Communicate. Communicate.

2) Don’t think you are going to have a “perfect” marriage. To do so is to set yourself up for an enormous let-down. There is no such thing. How can anyone expect a perfect marriage when there is no perfect person? You are as imperfect as your intended wife or husband. If a person was inane enough to try to do everything you wanted them to do and behave exactly as you dictated, you would still have an imperfect marriage and one does not have to be a rocket scientist to figure out why.

3) Don’t believe your partner can make you happy. Come on now. Wake up and smell the coffee. No one has the power to make us happy. This is something we can only do for ourselves and it is a choice. For example, let’s say your new husband/wife decided to cook a special meal for you with all the trimmings. You are both surprised and delighted. Now, did he/she make you happy? NO. You made yourself happy. How? In recognizing his/her thoughtfulness in going through the trouble of creating this meal, you chose to appreciate what was done for you which had a positive affect and you felt “happy.” Take the same scenario only this time you are displeased. You don’t like what was cooked and think your spouse should have “known” this and you choose to display an attitude of disapproval. Negative feelings are evoked and what was intended to be pleasant turns ugly. Did your spouse make you unhappy? NO. You made yourself unhappy. How? By chosing to be non-appreciative and negative in your thinking which resulted in a negative affect, “unhappiness or displeasure.” In other words, how each individual choose to interpret events, behaviors, communications determines how each individual will “feel”. Negative feelings cannot be produced by positive thoughts.

4) Don’t be on police stake-out patrol. No human wants to feel they are being watched 24/7 or need to give an account for every place they go or justify for everything they do. Nor do they want you following them like a shadow. No couple want their partner with them all the time. We all need space to grow, space to share with others, space to be alone. Don’t expect your partner to want to do everything with you. If you have trust issues, deal with it BEFORE you say “I Do.”

Rev. Saundra L. Washington, D.D., is an ordained clergywoman, veteran social worker, and Founder of AMEN Ministries. http://www.clergyservices4u.org. She is also the author of two coffee table books: Room Beneath the Snow: Poems that Preach and Negative Disturbances: Homilies that Teach. Her new book, Out of Deep Waters: My Grief Management Workbook, will be available in July.

The beginning of the journey of two souls begins with their vows on their wedding day and thus a wedding should be perfect, flawless and blissful. Everything right from the table linen to the food, the venue and especially the wedding gown has to be perfectly arranged with meticulous effort. If you are going for a memorable and hassle-free Atlanta wedding reception, one of the finest venues that you should consider is the Emory Conference Center. Only ten minutes away from downtown Atlanta and situated within clean and fresh forest nature surroundings, a wedding reception at the Emory Conference Center will be breathtaking.

Hosting your wedding at Emory will give a choice of five halls for your Atlanta wedding reception. Varying in sizes and room décor theme, you can decide which type of theme that you want your wedding reception to be and match them to the room. From a Garden atmosphere to a Mill House, the staff at Emory will ensure that you wedding reception will be planned to sheer perfection. In fact, you can even opt to host your wedding reception outdoors in their Garden Courtyard surrounded by lush greenery or at their Silver Pavilion with French Doors and even a fireplace. Moreover, they have also included in their wedding packages, private reception rooms, cake cutting services, customized dance floor, excellent cuisine with a wide choice of menus, a cake table and serving staff in tuxedo fit for a grand wedding party.

Couples opting for a more contemporary wedding reception with a focus on great food and a party atmosphere should check out The Clubhouse located in the city directly opposite Lenox Square. Atlanta wedding receptions held here will definitely have a huge selection of dinner or hi-tea menus, cocktail and bar selections, all of which are prepared by their talented chefs. Apart from that, The Clubhouse offers party decoration services from flower arrangements, to live music, to even a selection of chocolate wedding favors for you to choose from. With this, you will be sure that there won’t be anything that you will miss out on, as The Clubhouse would have taken care of everything for your dream Atlanta wedding reception!

The sports fans couples will surely be taken by the idea of having their wedding reception with a view of the Atlanta Turner baseball field. Situated within the stadium, the 755 Club in Turner Field offers a spectacular view of the field amidst the Atlanta skyline. The food served is one of the best in Atlanta with a wide variety of steaks, seafood and desserts; this will be a wedding reception that your guests will never forget! Built with a floor space of 24000 square feet, this venue is capable of hosting up to 500 guests and includes Atlanta wedding reception planning services as well. That is why you won’t have to worry yourself too much with a reception here as everything would have been taken cared of!

© Copyright Randy Wilson, All Rights Reserved.

The most heavily populated city in Nevada, Las Vegas is considered not only as a major vacation and shopping destination but also the center of gambling in the United States. Although it is often called Sin City because of legalized gambling and prostitution, availability of alcoholic beverages, and various forms and degrees of adult entertainment, its glamorous and enchanting image has made it a popular setting in the movies and television programs.

Dubbed as “The Entertainment Capital of the World,” Las Vegas is not only known for its tourist attractions, but also for its infamous ‘Las Vegas Weddings’.

Las Vegas is by far the most popular destination-wedding spot in the United States (and perhaps the world). About 120,000 weddings are held in Las Vegas every year, and it is a perfect place for couples (especially celebrities) who want to get married in a quick and different (or unusual) way.

A lot of couples prefer to have a Las Vegas wedding because of the following advantages:

It is affordable. Las Vegas weddings cost less than traditional wedding ceremonies.

It can be held on short notice. Most chapels in Las Vegas allow couples to book for their wedding right away - others even accommodate walk-ins!

It is convenient. Hotels in Las Vegas usually have their own wedding chapels, with a wedding coordinator that takes in charge of all the preparations - from the flowers and music to the officiant and the souvenirs - and can get in touch with the couple on the phone or even online.

It is fun. Las Vegas weddings offer couples with a fun and amusing way to get married - even with an Elvis impersonator as their officiant!

It allows couples to start their honeymoon early. After the wedding, there is no need for couples to board a plane and head out of town - Las Vegas is a great honeymoon destination in itself!

Read More Articles On Las Vegas Weddings At http://www.weddingtipsguide.com/Information-On-Las-Vegas-Weddings.html

Holly Stevens Has Written Many Articles On Weddings And Help Teach Readers How To Save Money While Planning A Wedding. Learn The Secrets To Choosing The Perfect Wedding Bands By Visiting The Website

Paternity Testing - Are you raising someone else’s child?

Back in the 1700s, the best way to determine paternity was by a good hard look at the child, followed by a good hard look at the father. Enough coincidences and maybe a relationship could be proposed. A hundred years later, eye colour was discovered to be a paternity identifier. This theory has had its flaws exposed because of recent DNA advances. We now know that eye colour is determined by at least six alleles, or genetic markers. Paternity testing has become a lot easier and affordable over the past few years due to advances in DNA science. Although an estimated 200,000 DNA tests are conducted each year by states needing to sort child-support and welfare issues, few people are willing to conduct their own at-home paternity test because they don’t realize the simplicity and convenience of an at-home paternity test.

How does a home DNA test work?

Paternity testing requires a painless sample from both the child and possible father. Even without a sample from the mother, DNA paternity test results are up to 99.9999% accurate-that’s one-in-a-million odds your results are incorrect. Most companies provide a free home kit for you to provide the samples and require you to send the kit back to the laboratory with the accompanying fee.

Because many companies are aware of the discomfort of drawing blood from a child in order to get a sample, buccal (mouth) swabs are being accepted as an alternative. By gently massaging the inside of the child’s mouth, cheek cells are collected. These cells are then sent to the lab for testing. Labs analyze up to sixteen genetic markers of the child and match them against the markers of the alleged father. Because each of us receives half our genetic markers from each parent, the results of DNA paternity testing are still accurate without the DNA information of the mother. Most labs will have results in 10 days and charge about $290 for a basic paternity verification test.

What else can a DNA test do?

DNA kits can also be used to analyze siblingship, establish cousin or grandparent relationships, determine twin zygosity (i.e. whether twins are fraternal or identical), identify ancestral origin, verify Native American decent, assure parents they left the hospital with the right baby, and most important, provide legal evidence - be prepared to pay a bit more for legal tests. Legal tests can be used to settle adoption issues, settle child-support disputes, and provide information for immigration files.

How to choose a DNA laboratory

- Accreditation is a vital part of choosing a laboratory. Accredited labs have an annual audit and inspection, undergo internal and external reviews, and have their equipment calibrated for accuracy. Look for an ISO and/or AABB certification. Accredited labs will have a good reputation and near 100% track record for court cases.

- Look for hidden fees. Some companies will charge you for the kit and then charge you again for the results. Also, double check when you order your kit that you’re only buying the results you need.

- Ask about privacy. Make sure that your identity and intentions are kept secure.

Enjoy piece of mind

Be confident that the questions you have can be answered. DNA testing is safe and stress-free. Find a free kit and an information packet and you’re on your way to getting the piece of mind that you deserve.

Pete McFraser is a marketing representative of DNA Bioscience, a company that specializes in paternity testing, and helping fathers receive their paternity pay.
To learn more about DNA testing, visit www.dnabioscience.com

Secret Tips For Negotiating Your Credit Card Debt

Most individuals believe that it is unattainable for a individual to negotiate their credit card debt with a credit card company because the company is not interested in working out a deal with the individuals that hold their credit cards. The truth is that many of these credit card companies may be prepared to speak to you and work out some kind of debt management plan for your debt because they would rather recoup some of the money that you owe to them easily instead of having to pay someone to endlessly reach you about the debt and possibly not receive any payments from you at all. There are a number of different things you should keep in mind when seeking to negotiate your credit card debt and keeping these things in mind may assist you a great deal in your pursuits.

The first thing that you need to keep in mind when attempting to negotiate your credit card debt is to be honest about your situation when you are talking to the representative of the company you wish to negotiate with. You would be stunned at how easygoing some companies can be when a individual has a valid hardship, such as the loss of a job, the loss of a spouse, or are medically incapable to work for a period of time. Some credit card companies are now offering a type of credit card insurance to be able to suspend your payments for a period of time if any of these circumstances happen and disrupt your ability to make your payments because they have observed that many of their customers experience these situations once in a while.

Another thing to remember when negotiating your credit card debt is to be sure that you are addressing with the proper personel that has the authorization to help you. A lot of times you may be speaking to a individual who does not have the authorization to negotiate your debt circumstance. Sometimes in this case they try to differ you from achieving your goal by saying they can’t aid you. Insist on talking with someone in the company that can help you, if neccesary try and find a local branch where you can speak to somebody in person.

It is very essential to always be kind and courteous to the individuals that you are talking to at the company when you are trying to negotiate your debt. Even if you are getting frustrated by the inaction of the employees at the company, do not lose your cool because then the employees will be much less inclined to listen to what you have to say. Being kind always has a better reception than being unfriendly and remember, you would like these people to assist you, not hang up on you.

Shopping for your bridal gown is one of the most important essentials of your wedding preparation. It should be a lot of fun, and it’s going to be if you do your homework. Although it might be difficult to resist at first, you should never shop for a bridal gown based on instinct.

You should research before you walk in to the first bridal gown salon. Chances are this is going to be the first time you shop for a bridal gown, so you need to prepare.

It is essential that you give yourself plenty of time to buy your bridal gown. Choosing your bridal gown up to one year prior to your wedding day is not unusual at all. If your dress needs to be ordered and altered you’ll need that much time. Buying your bridal gown early is also a great stress reducer.

Before you visit the bridal gown retailer, you have to do your homework. To get a general idea of what’s out there, you should start with magazines. Then, move on to the Internet for more detailed searches. There are thousands of Web sites dedicated to wedding shopping where you can learn about bridal gowns.

After you get a general idea of what you like, be sure to take detailed notes. Even if you have an excellent memory, it is best to make detailed notes for reference. You shouldn’t just write down what you like about a bridal gown, but the reason why you like a particular feature. If you are well prepared, your sales person at the salon will be able to help you better.

Once you have a detailed list of designs and designers you’d like to try, you should make an appointment with a salon. Don’t go by yourself. Take your mother, your sister, your girlfriends, your bridesmaids, your honor attendant, and your relatives. In other words, bring everyone that matters! Instead of bringing all of them to each salon at the same time limit the shopping team to no more than five members per shopping trip. It is OK to shop around for your dress by yourself if you need the privacy, but you shouldn’t make your decision without some outside opinion.

You should bring the following with you on your wedding gown shopping trip.

Shoes with the same height as your wedding shoes are going to be on your wedding day.
A bustier, a control-top panty hose and be sure slip a slip into your purse.

Wedding Favors
Wedding favors, personalized wedding favors and bridal shower gifts.

Web based sports wagering webpages are mainly governed by means of three structures. These agencies are the OSGA (the Offshore Gaming Association), the IGC (Interactive Gaming Council) and the Fidelity Trust Gaming Association FTGA. Kentucky Derby 134 Update - Monday, March 31

The OSGA is an autonomous institute that monitors the thriving offshore sports gaming trade, they undertake to also deliver sports gamblers the ability to quickly track down fair enterprises to play gambling games with. It endeavors to protect client’s rights, and in addition they don’t impose any particaption costs. The Offshore Gaming Association are a highly well-qualified not to mention nonpartisan third party organisation who express non-biased impressions, advised by your comments, nonpartisan studies, telephone conversations, prompts and also dispenses inside gossip.

The Interactive Gaming Council is a not-for-profit agency. The organisation has been designed to allow an arena for involved participants to discuss subjects and also to boost mutual concerns in the international interactive gambling profession, to establish trustworthy not to mention answerable professional guidelines and forms which endeavor to enhance buyer confidence in interactive wagering products and utilities, and to aid as the trade’s extensive procedure guardian and the IGC acts as an info base of operations.

The IGC have made a regard for upholding trustworthiness, honorable practise also believability thanks to its tough criteria, and its appeal for concerns of conscientious practise. The Interactive Gaming Council governs offshore gambling by means of employing a particular 10-point code of conduct moreover bills sports gambling business concerns fees to exhibit the council’s logo. Malcontent betting lovers may, should they wish, air any of their disputes to the Interactive Gaming Council.

The FTGA has been set up in order to set a standard which will improve the standards of live gambling trading operations. The council think that through associating exclusively with businesses of honorable standing, they can make an alliance of the most fair and most efficient overseas gaming businesses in the world at large. There are agencies that exist to co-ordinate the procedures practised by networked sports betting and which should in time help to mitigate any misgivings experienced by detractors. Internet sports gambling internet sites are absolutely safe, beacuse private details are no longer demanded and in addition the remuneration not to mention the odds should be equivalent to a common Vegas-style sportsbet. These web sites lower traveling, but keep the basic ethos, only today you are in a position to gamble at your own desk.